


ah shit here we go again

by cerealbowler



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: 00 line is chaotic, Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, M/M, OT21 (NCT), Some Plot, Sporadic Updates, Texting, cause we aint pussies in this house, dumbassery, everyone clowns mark (sorry), im mostly trying to feed the jaewin nation, kun wants to die, luwoo and chensung r best friends uwu, mostly yangyang though, overall just a mess, slight chensung?? owo, this is very ooc, yuta is a sports jock TM
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-05-12 04:11:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 9,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19221328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cerealbowler/pseuds/cerealbowler
Summary: Xiaojun: stop spamming IN CLASSXiaojun: you’re making the teacher look at me funkyMark: “funky” ??? what are you, 40? lmaoXiaojun: this is why you’re single, mark. You resort to unfunny comebacks to try and pick apart others’ self esteem. When in reality this is just some kind of cover-up for your own downfalls and insecuritiesMark: ouch





	1. useless thermos can

**Author's Note:**

> nhs (neo high school)  
> 10- renjun, jeno, donghyuck, jaemin, yangyang, chenle, jisung  
> 11- jungwoo, yukhei, mark, xiaojun, kunhang  
> 12- jaehyun, sicheng
> 
> sm university  
> 1- kun, doyoung, ten  
> 2- johnny, taeyong, yuta  
> 3- taeil

3:36 AM

[Chenle] [Jisung] have entered the chat.

Chenle: yo check out this vine

Chenle: [link]

Jisung: everyone’s seen that, stupid

Jisung: [link]

Jisung: now THIS is the superior vine. 

[Johnny] has entered the chat.

Johnny: why are you two up? Aren’t you guys...babies??

Jisung: shut up old man

Chenle: yeah aren’t you too old to like, exist?

Johnny: listen here you two shits-

[Taeyong] has entered the chat.

Taeyong: GO TO SLEEP. Don’t you two have a test tomorrow??? I’m going to email your teacher.

Jisung: bet. What r u going to tell him? That you can’t take care of ur kids?

Chenle: i peak at 3 hrs of sleep

Taeyong: eye-

Taeyong: i literally RAISED this whole family on my back and this is what i get in return? a BRAT? 

Taeyong: and a child that i am mildly concerned for?

Chenle: don’t worry about me! Sleep is for the weak lolololol

Taeyong: … 

[Kun] has entered the chat.

Kun: i just gave up with the kids. 

[Kun] has left the chat.

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: can y’all shut up? Unlike chenji i actually care about my grades And im not trying to conk out in class 

Johnny: aight

Johnny: not like i was even spamming in the first place but ok

Johnny: i’ll actually...yknow not b an asshole to people 

Johnny: and listen to their totally reasonable requests

[Johnny] has left the chat.

Jisung: yall hear smth?

Chenle: nah mustve been the wind

Renjun: fucking SHUT UP 

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Taeyong: Renjun, language!

Taeyong: and you two, GO TO SLEEP.

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

Chenle: …

Jisung: …

Jisung: [link]

Jisung: have you seen this one yet?

3:27 PM

[Jaehyun] [Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Jaehyun: are u done tutoring yet?

Sicheng: in like 5 minutes. She said she has a big test tomorrow so im going over stuff more

Jaehyun: ah, okay…

Sicheng: did you need me for anything?

Jaehyun: :) nope :) just :) asking :)

[Yang Yang] [Kunhang] [Jungwoo] have entered the chat.

YangYang: owo?

YangYang: Are you thinking what i’m thinking? 

Kunhang: ...that doesn’t sound like a good idea 

Jungwoo: love me some good drama tho

Sicheng: What are you guys talking about? 

Jaehyun: …

Kunhang: why does that look slightly threatening

YangYang: it is. But do we care? No

Kunhang: i kind of think we should but uh-

[Yukhei] has entered the chat.

Yukhei: yo jae-d!!! Someone gave me something to give to you :D

Jaehyun: What is it?

Yukhei: idk some girl just gave me a bag with stuff in it and told me to give it to you

Yukhei: it looks like chocolate and a letter th

Yukhei: wait

Sicheng: …

Sicheng: who gave it to you?

Yukhei: ….i’m no snitch

Jungwoo: tbh for her safety i wouldnt tell him

Sicheng: who. was. it.

Jaehyun: yeah, who was it? i should at least meet them face to face…

Sicheng: .

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

Jaehyun: to turn them down, of course

Jaehyun: i already have someone else in mind

Yang Yang: owo intensifies ???

Kunhang: jaehyun… 

Jaehyun: .

Jungwoo: Yukhei…

Yukhei: [rest]

Jaehyun: shit.

[Jaehyun] has left the chat.

Jungwoo: YUKHEI HOW DID YOU EVER THINK THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA???

Yukhei: I’M SORRY I DIDN’T REALIZE-

YangYang: man i thot i was dumb but not this dumb

Kunhang: yangyang...not now

[Xiaojun] has entered the chat

Xiaojun: yangyang, kunhang. Get off your phones, kun wants you two. Said it had to do with duct tape and the shower head??

YangYang: gotta BLAST

[Yang Yang] has left the chat.

Kunhang: last time i’m EVER listening to yangyang…

[Kunhang] has left the chat.

Jungwoo: now i really want to know what they did??? 

Yukhei: tbh, i wouldn’t put anything past them

Yukhei: remember the shampoo and stove incident?

Jungwoo: that was wild

Yukhei: also, when can we meet up for the assignment?

Jungwoo: in 15 minutes ish? I gotta get some stuff ready

Yukhei: at the usual?

Jungwoo: yep :D

Yukhei: see ya then :D

[Jungwoo] [Yukhei] have left the chat.

[Donghyuck] has entered the chat.

Donghyuck: @Jeno @Renjun @Jaemin @YangYang GET ONLINE I NEED HELP

[YangYang] has entered the chat.

YangYang: can’t, getting my ass beat by kun rn :p

[YangYang] has left the chat.

Donghyuck: you absolute useless thermos can…

[Jeno] has entered the chat.

Jeno: What do you need, Hyuck?

Donghyuck: okay SO I DONT GET WhAT THIS ESSAY PRomPT meANS??? LIKE THIS SHIT DON’T MAKE S E N S E

Donghyuck: AND ITS DUE IN TWO HOURS

Jeno: send it to me! ^^

Donghyuck: ugh, what did i ever do to deserve such an angel??

Jeno: ^w^b

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: what did you need?

Jaemin: nvm i see 

Jaemin: just yall being disgusting like USUAL

Donghyuck: oh shut up

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: why didn’t you @ chenle and jisung??? They’re like...always online

Jaemin: inJUNNIE UWU 

Donghyuck: have you seen chenle and jisung’s grades?

Renjun: you right

Jaemin: :<

Renjun: sigh

Renjun: hi jaemin

Jaemin: :>

Donghyuck: absolutely gross

Donghyuck: OH SHIT I HAVE TO FINISH MY ESSAY SKFJAF

[Donghyuck] has left the chat.

Jaemin: renjunnie… we’re here alone now ;)

Renjun: not anymore

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Jaemin: :(

[Jaemin] has left the chat.


	2. dotae are rule followers gross

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> into the sm university mess we go

7:56 PM

[Doyoung] [Taeyong] [Ten] have entered the chat. 

Ten: why are the kids so fucking messy

Doyoung: you were literally one of those “kids” a couple months ago

Doyoung: and don’t group my sweet child jeno with those gremlins

Ten: lies, i hear lies

Ten: never was i so naive, so childish, so DUMB as them

Taeyong: Don’t be rude to the babies.

Taeyong: Also, don’t those three basically mean the same thing?

Doyoung: yeah

Doyoung: Ten is just illiterate 

Ten: i hate you guys

Ten: just let me FLEX for once okay??

[Yuta] has entered the chat.

Yuta: did i hear FLEX?

Doyoung: No. 

Ten: no-

Yuta: why are you all such downers

Yuta: speaking of which, you guys need to leave the dorm at some point

Yuta: live a little! Party a bit! Make bad decisions! Drink, and then get really hungover! 

Yuta: cough doyoung

Taeyong: Yuta. There are children in this chat.

Yuta: and your point? You cant protect them forever

Yuta: tbh i think they’re more cursed than us no matter ur efforts

Taeyong: I-

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

Yuta: ??? 

Doyoung: He’s just staring at the wall now

Doyoung: i think you and jisung broke him

Ten: he’s been de-parented twice in two days

Yuta: ...de-parented???

Yuta: anyways, my offer still stands

Yuta: please??? Let’s go out as a group

Ten: hell YEAH im down

Doyoung: only if you pay.

Yuta: …

Yuta: honestly, fuck you

Doyoung: what’s it going to be? Break the bank, or your friendships?

Yuta: fine

Yuta: see you this weekend at 7 then

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Doyoung: he didn’t even ASK if i was free.

Ten: aren’t you though? you’re literally so jobless

Ten: your only job is drilling holes into taeyong with your eyes when you think he’s not looking

Ten: like i get he’s hot and all but isn’t there a better way to go about it

Doyoung: …

Doyoung: Ten, sleep with one eye open

Ten: i’m not afraid of you BITCH

Doyoung: :) 

[Doyoung] has left the chat.

[Johnny] [Kun] has entered the chat.

Johnny: i’m not trying to roast doyoung but

Kun: so you’re trying to roast doyoung

Kun: continue

Johnny: but i think everyone knows about his “thing” besides

Johnny: *******

Kun: why are you censoring it?

Ten: because johnny’s a pussy

Johnny: eye-

Johnny: i’m about to pull a taeyong

Ten: bet

[Johnny] has left the chat.

Kun: …

Ten: so, are you coming this weekend?

Kun: we’re going to disregard Johnny?

Ten: ye

Kun: i’ll come if im free

Ten: boring

Ten: break some rules

Ten: don’t be a dotae

Kun: a dotae?

Ten: doyoung + taeyong

Ten: the rule followers™

Kun: They’re literally just trying to get an education

Kun: and not break the law like you and yuta

Ten: okay, so? 

Kun: …

Kun: i’ll come.

Ten: !! seeya

[Kun] [Ten] has left the chat.

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: @Yuta get back here

[Yuta] has entered the chat.

Yuta: yes, my moon, my stars, my love??

Taeil: cut the crap

Taeil: its your turn to be the designated driver

Yuta: about that

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Taeil: . 

Taeil: EVERY TIME

[Taeil] has left the chat.


	3. mark failed his sats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> will jaewin sort out their communication issues? will renjun finally tolerate jaemin's presence? will everyone stop bullying mark?

8:34 AM

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: Does anyone know why Sicheng has been sulking since yesterday?

Renjun: like he didn’t even come to my room ONCE to borrow my charger pack

Renjun: and we all know he needs his phone to survive

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: Hey ;)))

Renjun: gross

Jaemin: :(

Jaemin: don’t you ever read the chat?

Renjun: no?? I’m way too busy

Jaemin: well whatever

Jaemin: jae’s been acting weird too

Jaemin: yesterday when he came over he sat retyping a text like 34 times on the couch and let me beat him in mario kart

Renjun: you watch him text?

Jaemin: no no he just turns on his keyboard noises to like beyond max levels

Renjun: interesting

Jaemin: anyways i’m PRETTY sure i know what this is about

Renjun: spill??

Jaemin: no

Jaemin: this is the groupchat

Jaemin: you’ll have to dm me if you want the receipts ;))

Renjun: suddenly i don’t want to know

[Jaehyun] has entered the chat.

Jaehyun: …

Jaehyun: Jaemin…

Jaemin: tell renjun i loved him

Jaemin: no homo tho

[Jaemin] has left the chat.

Renjun: i’m literally right here??

Jaehyun: I’m going to beat him up

Renjun: good

Jaehyun: actually 

Jaehyun: i’m going to forward an article about why adopting a dog is bad for your health and mental stability to his mom

Jaehyun: say goodbye to that puppy, jaemin

Jaehyun: : )

Renjun: whyd i get chills… 

[Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Renjun: hi ge

Sicheng: …

Sicheng: I’m going to strangle you when we get home

Renjun: nah

[Renjun] has left the chat.

[Mark] has entered the chat.

Mark: why are you guys on your phones???

Jaehyun: cheating on math test

Mark: your best friend is literally a math tutor

Mark: ???

Jaehyun: uhhhh…

Jaehyun: sicheng can you

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

Mark: …

Mark: you fucked up didn’t you

Jaehyun: NO-

Jaehyun: yes? Maybe??

Mark: then do something?

Jaehyun: spitting wise words all of a sudden huh

Jaehyun: how come you couldn’t do that on ur sats

Mark: WHY ARE YOU COMING FOR ME LIKE THIS

[Xiaojun] has entered the chat.

Xiaojun: please

Xiaojun: PLEASE

Xiaojun: stop spamming IN CLASS

Xiaojun: you’re making the teacher look at me funky

Mark: “funky” ??? what are you, 40? lmao

Xiaojun: this is why you’re single, mark. You resort to unfunny comebacks to try and pick apart others’ self esteem. When in reality this is just some kind of cover-up for your own downfalls and insecurities 

Mark: ouch

Mark: too far :(

Xiaojun: sorry.

[Xiaojun] has left the chat.

Jaehyun: damn, what’d you do to him?

Mark: i ate his chips

[Jaehyun] has left the chat.

Mark: eye-

Mark: why do i even try

[Mark] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the answer is no to all of them


	4. gay panic and discovering johnny's downfalls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> double update today because i won't be able to update again till the weekend/monday!

5:23 PM

[Chenle] [Taeyong] have entered the chat.

Taeyong: Where have you and Jisung been?

Taeyong: I thought you guys lived in this chat?

Chenle: Oh hi taeyong!!

Chenle: haha no we passed out

Chenle: or at least i did

Taeyong: …

Taeyong: Are you sure you’re okay?

Chenle: perfectly chipper 

[Jisung] has entered the chat.

Jisung: what’s up mother fuckers

Chenle: eyyy

Taeyong: PLEASE

Taeyong: What happened to small, obedient Jisung?

Jisung: he’s dead

Chenle: :(

Jisung: …he’s hiding

Chenle: :)

[Kun] has entered the chat.

Kun: 

Kun:

Kun:

Jisung: why isn’t he saying anything

Taeyong: Kun, are you okay?

Kun: 

Chenle: is this about the bookshelf and fire extinguisher? 

Kun:

Kun: i don’t know, is it?

[Chenle] has left the chat.

Jisung: please don’t kill him

Kun: no promises.

[Kun] has left the chat.

Taeyong: Honestly, I think I have it hard sometimes with you guys and then Kun comes along

Jisung: rip chenle and yangyang

Jisung: death by kun’s wrath

Taeyong: Oh by the way, I got an email from your teacher.

Jisung: suddenly i have to leave

[Jisung] has left the chat.

Taeyong: She says you need to stop sleeping in class, even if your grades are satisfactory

Taeyong: … 

Taeyong: Should I be concerned that something else happened?

Taeyong: @Jisung ????

[Doyoung] has entered the chat.

Doyoung: Oh hey Taeyong

Taeyong: Hi

Taeyong: How’s your studying going?

Doyoung: kind of like hell

Taeyong: Do you want me to drop by again? I can bring some food.

Doyoung: That

Doyoung: that would be great actually, thank you

Taeyong: No problem :) 

Taeyong: Always here to help my favorite. I’ll be over in fifteen!

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

[Yuta] [Ten] [Taeil] [Johnny] have entered the chat.

Ten: Doyoung is spasming in his chair right now 

Yuta: send pics lmao

Ten: [img] save it before he strangles me

Taeil: guys let’s not bully Doyoung

Taeil: god knows he literally picked the densest person ever to woo

Johnny: You can’t talk

Johnny: you thought Yuta’s constant gifts were “signs of friendship”

Johnny: for THREE months

Taeil: WHAT IF THEY WERE

Yuta: probably not considering we’re not friends anymore ;))

Taeil: sometimes i wonder why i’m dating you

Yuta: ;))))

Ten: okay this is gross i’m leaving

Doyoung: Ten.

Ten: I’M L E A V I N G YEET

[Ten] has left the chat.

Doyoung: I HATE ALL OF YOU GUYS

Johnny: don’t hate the player, hate the system

Taeil: I’m pretty sure that’s not how that goes

Doyoung: also don’t call taeyong dense

Yuta: so you admit its taeyong?

Doyoung: 

[Doyoung] has left the chat.

Taeil: …

Taeil: I would say stop teasing him, but he kind of did that to himself

Johnny: lmaoooo

Johnny: wait till taeyong comes back online

Yuta: TAEILLLLLLlllLLlllLlLlLlLlL 

Taeil: i’m literally right next to you WHAT

Yuta: uwu 

Taeil: … 

Johnny: imagine dating someone like yuta’s annoying ass

Johnny: glad i can’t relate

Yuta: at least i’m not single

Yuta: : )

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Taeil: he’s right, though

Taeil: you’ve been single since junior year of hs

Johnny: OK MAYBE I’VE BEEN BUSY??

Taeil: Say that to your constant marathons of the same four shows.

Taeil: anyways, unlike you, i’m actually busy

Taeil: got a boyfriend to attend to

[Taeil] has left the chat.

Johnny:

Johnny: why do i feel like i was just hardcore dissed

Johnny: and by taeil of all people

[Donghyuck] has entered the chat.

Donghyuck: because you were??

Johnny: i don’t need to hear that from my 12 year old cousin

Donghyuck: I’M NOT 12

Johnny: Whatever you say

[Johnny] has left the chat.

[Jeno] have entered the chat.

Jeno: Hyuck! Did you finish your essay? ^^

Donghyuck: Yep!! Thanks to you :)

Donghyuck: are you free tomorrow?

Jeno: i think so, why?

Donghyuck: wanna go to the arcade after school?

Jeno: sure :)

Donghyuck: !! it’s a date then 

Jeno: 

Jeno: it is????

Donghyuck: UH

[Donghyuck] has left the chat.

Jeno: oh ok…?

[Jeno] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chaotic gay noises


	5. jungwoo wants to commit a group robbery <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hihi! i'm back from my hiatus  
> now onto the headassery uwu

8:26 PM

[Kunhang] [Johnny] have entered the chat.

Kunhang: okay i almost came here earlier to say something but i suddenly felt like i was intruding on smth

Johnny: you’ll get used to it

Johnny: and learn not to give a fuck

Kunhang: … 

Kunhang: that’s reassuring i guess?

Johnny: oh taeyong’s back from doyoung’s 

Johnny: i told him i was working on my presentation

Kunhang: are you not?

Johnny: definitely am

[Johnny] has left the chat.

 

Kunhang: …

Kunhang: well i was going to say that kun

[YangYang] has entered the chat.

YangYang: kun invited everyone to hang out!!

YangYang: @everyone

Kunhang: …

YangYang: oops sry kunhang lol

Kunhang: i’m-

[Sicheng] [Jungwoo] [Yukhei] [Mark] have entered the chat.

Sicheng: hang out? To do what?

Jungwoo: we should rob a bank

Yukhei: heck yeah!  
!  
Mark: or we could like...not

Mark: i’d rather not get arrested 

Jungwoo: don’t pull a dotae

Mark: a what

Yukhei: a doyoung and taeyong

Jungwoo: don’t you read the chat??

Mark: i literally-

Mark: okay thanks

Sicheng: Kunhang?? To do what?

Kunhang: idk yet

YangYang: he says that we can all decide as a group

Sicheng: hows he going to please 21 people…

[Donghyuck] has entered the chat.

Donghyuck: Mark’s opinion doesn’t matter so that’s only 20 people to  
account for

Mark: I LITERALLY BREATHED

Donghyuck: And? That’s already doing too much

Mark: eye

Mark: why can’t i catch a break

Mark: first xiaojun, then jaehyun, and now you

YangYang: first off you definitely wronged xiaojun

Jungwoo: yeah, you can’t just eat other peoples’ food 

Mark: I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS HIS

Yukhei: sure, sure

Yukhei: so you ate it thinking it was a stranger’s

Mark: i

Mark: shoot

Mark: ...you got me there

Donghyuck: what a disgusting being

Kunhang: OKAY enough guys

Kunhang: let’s get some suggestions going

Sicheng: how about

Sicheng: about

Kunhang: yes?

Sicheng: idk

Kunhang:

[Kunhang] has left the chat.

[Jaehyun] has entered the chat.

Jaehyun: what’s up?

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

Jaehyun: …

Jungwoo: you guys are still not talking??

Jaehyun: HE’S JUST GHOSTING ME FOR NO REASON

Jungwoo: smh

YangYang: we’re not doing much, just trying to think of things to do

Jaehyun: for what?

YangYang: scroll up

Jaehyun: oh i see

Jaehyun: idk

Yukhei: I still think jungwoo’s plan was the best

Jungwoo: also, it was the ONLY plan

YangYang: ye tbh i think it’d be a nice bonding experience :P

Jaehyun: what...even

Jaehyun: this is why kunhang left all of you guys 

[Jaehyun] has left the chat.

Yukhei: lame

[Yukhei] [Jungwoo] [YangYang] have left the chat.

11:34 PM

[Yukhei] [Mark] have entered the chat.

Yukhei: Mark, did you do the homework yet?

Mark: ye

Yukhei: send it? 

Mark: no do your own work

Yukhei: aight be like that then

Yukhei: @jungwoo?

[Jungwoo] has entered the chat.

Jungwoo: on it

Yukhei: thanks bro

[Jungwoo] [Yukhei] have left the chat.

[Donghyuck] has entered the chat.

Donghyuck: imagine not being stingy abt hw

Donghyuck: Mark can’t relate

Mark: IM

Mark: @Doyoung @Taeyong 

Donghyuck: WHYD YOU GO AND DO THAT

[Doyoung] [Taeyong] have entered the chat.

Doyoung: Who called for me?

Mark: me

Doyoung: nvm 

Doyoung: you’re not jeno

[Doyoung] has left the chat.

Mark: i swear doyoung has a brother complex…

Donghyuck: or he doesn’t like you hhh

Taeyong: What did you guys need?

Mark: tell donghyuck that doing ur own work isnt lame

Taeyong: It’s not lame, Donghyuck. It’s being academically honest.

Donghyuck: you’d be surprised old man

Taeyong: … 

Donghyuck: anyways i gtg and get the hw from someone who’ll actually send it 

[Donghyuck] has left the chat.

Taeyong: Mark, do I deserve this disrespect? Haven’t I literally raised all of you?

Mark: I mean- I guess?

Mark: I always thought that was mostly Kun and somewhat you

Taeyong: 

Taeyong: I’m going to go sit in the corner.

Taeyong: If you need help just go ask Kun. 

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

Mark: …

[Doyoung] has entered the chat.

Doyoung: what did you do mark

Doyoung: WHAT DID YOU DO MARK

Doyoung: HE’S LOOKING AT THE WALL AGAIN LIKE A KICKED PUPPY

Mark: UH

[Mark] has left the chat.

Doyoung: I’m keeping my eyes on you

[Doyoung] has left the chat.


	6. jaesung have a (not-so) secret ao3 acc

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we going back into the vortex

4:56 AM

[Johnny] [Ten] have entered the chat.

Johnny: and THAT’S why shrek 3 was the superior shrek movie

Ten: why...why do you know so much about shrek

Johnny: don’t question the master

Ten: aight...

Johnny: anyways why are you up late?

Ten: i was trying to finish up a choreography but it was being a bitch

Ten: u?

Johnny: binge-watching the office again

Ten: … 

Ten: Taeil is right, this is why you’re single

Johnny: uncalled for

Ten: also, i hate to be the voice of reason, but don’t you have a test tomorrow?

Ten: or today ig

Johnny: ...shit 

Ten: better pray Yuta’s up lmaoo

Johnny: HI Z Z UK

Johnny: @Yuta SEND NOTES

Johnny: bls...yuta the one TIME I NEED YOU

Ten: lmao rip

Ten: I’m going to head home now

Ten: good luck lol

Johnny: thot

[Ten] has left the chat.

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: what do you need? It’s 5 am

Johnny: don’t hate me for this

Johnny: but i need you to wake up yuta and tell him to send his notes

Taeil: ,,,

Taeil: absolutely not

Johnny: damn oof

[Taeil] has left the chat.

[Yuta] has entered the chat.

Yuta: bold of you to assume i was ASLEEP

Yuta: and yes, i will send you the notes

Johnny: MY SAVIOR

Yuta: for a small fee of 50 bucks

Johnny:

Johnny: bitch i’m POOR

Yuta: yeah you aint special

Yuta: why do you think my prices are so high?

Johnny: ugh fine

Yuta: [img] nice doing business with you

Johnny: you absolute devil

[Johnny] [Yuta] have left the chat.

3:15 PM

[Jeno] has entered the chat.

Jeno: @Donghyuck where are you?

Donghyuck: ? What do you mean

Jeno: weren’t we supposed to go to the arcade today together?

Donghyuck:

Donghyuck: SHIT AKLDFJDKLSFJ

Donghyuck: I’ll BE THERE IN LIKE 10 MINUTES

Donghyuck: i’M SO SORRY

Jeno: its okay lol ^w^

[Donghyuck] has left the chat.

[Jaemin] [Jisung] have entered the chat.

Jaemin: “But deep down, Jeno knew it wasn’t okay. Nothing Donghyuck did was okay.”

Jisung: “He drew further back into the corner, shying away from the onslaught of social interaction in the arcade. All these people playing games, but none of them were Donghyuck.”

Jeno: what 

Jeno: i’m fine?? -0-

Jisung: sure jan

Jeno: also why do you guys make it sound like i’m in love with him

Jaemin: JISUNG HE USED THE L*** WORD

Jisung: omfg

Jeno: what even…

Jaemin: “Jeno stared back into his cup, pretending not to see the minutes on his watch tick by. He wasn’t avoiding me, was he?”

Jeno: i don’t even have a watch? Or a cup???

Jisung: “As he looked up, Jeno locked eyes with Donghyuck. His beauty was entrancing– a fallen angel of some sorts. Jeno couldn’t tear his gaze away.”

Jeno: why are you guys turning this into a fanfic

Jeno: it’s not like i’m dating him

Jeno: he would never like me lol

Jisung: …

Jaemin: i’m about to break your skull jeno

Jeno: ???

Jeno: OH HE’S HERE

Jeno: BYE

[Jeno] has left the chat.

Jisung: why are we friends with such dumbasses

Jaemin: beats me

[Xiaojun] has entered the chat.

Xiaojun: you guys r so dramatic smh

Xiaojun: do you young people have nothing better to do smh 

Jaemin: aren’t you only a year older than us?

Xiaojun: …

Xiaojun: whatever

Jisung: yeah what do you juniors do anyway?

Jaemin: they hang out in the bathrooms vaping duh

Xiaojun: i’m literally the school council president

Xiaojun: why would i BE VAPING??

Jisung: nobody: xiaojun: im the school council president and ur not

Xiaojun: it’s true though lol 

Jisung: flexer 

Jaemin: wanna play mc rn 

Jisung: yes

Jisung: I choose the server tho

Jaemin: ...bitch

[Jisung] [Jaemin] have left the chat.

Xiaojun: genuinely worried about their grades

Xiaojun: anyways, i came here for something,,, @jungwoo

[Jungwoo] has entered the chat.

Jungwoo: You called?

Xiaojun: you turned in the project, right?

Jungwoo: uh… 

Jungwoo: let me check

Jungwoo: nope

Xiaojun:

Xiaojun: THEN GO AND PLEASE TURN IT IN 

Jungwoo: sHEESh

Jungwoo: it’s not even due until next week

Jungwoo: this is why you have like 4 friends

Xiaojun: haha, very funny. This is why your grades are all D’s.

Jungwoo: honestly why do you feel like a mix of doyoung and taeyong

Jungwoo: but in the meanest way possible

Xiaojun: … 

Xiaojun: am i supposed to feel thankful or offended?

Jungwoo: take your pick

Xiaojun: Another thing 

Xiaojun: Attention to all of you guys!! @Chenle @Jisung @Renjun @Jaemin @Donghyuck @Jeno @Yukhei @Jungwoo @Kunhang @YangYang @Jaehyun @Sicheng  
Xiaojun: make sure to turn in your permission slips for the school trip. It’s far off, but we still need them for the end of the year.

Xiaojun: oh, and @Mark

[Xiaojun] has left the chat.

[Renjun] [Sicheng] [Jaehyun] have entered the chat.

Renjun: lmao the only one he left out was mark

Sicheng: why does everyone hate mark again?

Jaehyun: he’s just fun to bully

Sicheng: … 

Jaehyun: WAIT DON’T GO OFFLINE

Renjun: you guys are still doing this?? It’s been like 2 days

Sicheng: doing what?

Renjun: not talking to each other???

Sicheng: i’m not doing anything. Just busy

Jaehyun: sure

Jaehyun: seriously, what’s going on? i don’t even know what i did wrong

Sicheng: you didn’t do anything. Bye.

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

[YangYang] has entered the chat.

Renjun: so are you guys going on the trip?

YangYang: idk its pretty eggspensive

Jaehyun: …

YangYang: I can see the gears turning in Jaehyun’s head

YangYang: i’ll dm you

Renjun: i think he should figure it out by himself

YangYang: but then he’ll fry his braincells?? We can’t do that to him

Jaehyun: you guys do realize i’m older than you both right

Renjun: we’re not the ones sicheng’s ignoring rn are we

Jaehyun: … 

Jaehyun: ouch?? 

Renjun: dw i’m sure he’ll come around eventually

YangYang: are you going on the trip, renjun?

Renjun: probably? Why not

YangYang: bc youre broke? ur the one with the normie earbuds

Renjun: ...yangyang..

YangYang: aight time to dip owo

[YangYang] has left the chat.

[Yukhei] has entered the chat.

Yukhei: jae did you ever contact that girl again?

Jaehyun: yeah

Jaehyun: turns out she just wanted me to give it to jaemin

Jaehyun: which i don’t really get because why didn’t she tell YOU that

Jaehyun: and also because Jaemin is insanely whipped for someone rn and he won’t shut up about him

Yukhei: thats

Yukhei: @Sicheng you can stop being jealous now

Renjun: wait Jaemin likes someone?

Jaehyun: …

Jaehyun: this is next level dumbassery 

[Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Renjun: thought you were busy, ge?

Sicheng: shut up.

Sicheng: and i’m not being jealous

Jaehyun: yeah why would he be??? 

Sicheng: … 

Sicheng: do you still need that math tutoring?

Jaehyun: yes please oml

Sicheng: dm me

Jaehyun: ily ty

[Sicheng] [Jaehyun] have left the chat.

Renjun: who do they think they’re fooling

Yukhei: they’re just as bad as doyoung and taeyong

Yukhei: if not worse

Renjun: careful, you don’t want doyoung on your case

[Doyoung] has entered the chat.

Renjun: rip

Renjun: good luck

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Yukhei: DOYOUNG HI

Doyoung: what’s that supposed to mean? What’s so bad about taeyong and i? 

Yukhei: ahhahah

Yukhei: yourejustbothemotionallyconstipated(mostlyyou)

[Yukhei] has left the chat.

Doyoung: … 

[Ten] has entered the chat.

Ten: perhaps the kids aren’t as stupid as I thought. 

Ten: he was STRAIGHT on

Ten: or gay on heh

Ten: also, is no one going to say anything about the meet up??

Doyoung: no

Ten: bitch

Ten: stop being a homebody 

Doyoung: YOU CAN’T JUST TELL PEOPLE TO STOP BEING THEMSELVES-

Ten: yeah you can

Ten: i just told you to

Ten: anyways i gtg tell Kun not to kill the kids

Doyoung: again?

Ten: yah

Doyoung: at this rate kun’s going to die before he kills them

[Ten] [Doyoung] have left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after this, i'll have probably 1-2 more prewritten updates! so, it'll probably take a little longer to update + i'll be adding in smaller gcs for plot reasons (but the ot21 gc will still be the main)


	7. taeyong yeets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yee yee boys (mini chapter today, sorry!! but the next one will be longer :) )

7:02 AM

[Kun] has entered the chat.

Kun: I have created a list of ideas we can do. 

Kun: And no, it doesn’t involve robbing a bank.

Kun: [link] here’s the doc. Feel free to add APPROPRIATE suggestions on to it.

Kun: also, let me know when you’re available. (and “sleeping” or “dying” is not a valid excuse to being busy.)

[Yuta] [Jungwoo] [Chenle] have entered the chat.

Jungwoo: I think robbing a bank is a Very Valid idea.

Chenle: normally i’d agree but what’s with ur obsession with crime

Yuta: he’s on the path of excellence 

Jungwoo: exactly

Jungwoo: robbing a bank teaches very necessary skills like stealth and high risks for high pay

Kun: DO NOT PUT IDEAS IN CHENLE’S HEAD.

Kun: does anyone see any other ideas they like?

Yuta: lets go see a game

Chenle: im going to be honest ur the only one in this gc who would know whats going on

Yuta: what? Im sure other people would know

Jungwoo: like?

Yuta: idk uh

Yuta: jae?? Yukhei?? ...mark? UHM

Chenle: it’s okay, you can stop lying to yourself

Jungwoo: i like the theater idea

Jungwoo: a low risk robbing environment

Chenle: :O ur right!!

Jungwoo: ik im a genius

Kun: Stop that. Do you want me to come and find you?

Jungwoo: …no sir

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: I found an upcoming Halloween festival thats happening soon. 

Taeil: [link]

Taeil: they have games, music, rides, food, etc

Yuta: GAMES???

Taeil: …not that kind of game

Yuta: suddenly my interest has gone down a lot

Yuta: but i’ll go for you <333

Yuta: oomph gtg professor walked in

Yuta: gotta stay on that GRIND

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Taeil: ok…

Taeil: so how’s the festival sound?

Kun: It’s a good idea.

[Taeyong] has entered the chat.

Chenle: Taeyong!!

Taeyong: Hi Chenle.

Taeyong: The festival sounds fun :)

Taeyong: But it’s best to ask if everyone’s free for it

Taeyong: I know Doyoung’s been busy with assignments and work recently.

Taeil: of course he knows doyoung’s schedule 

Taeyong: of course I do. Why wouldn’t I?

Taeil: no reason :)

Jungwoo: didn’t school just start like a month ago

Taeyong: You’ll see when you get to college. 

Jungwoo: suddenly i don’t want an education?? Ovo;

Kun: I’ll put up a poll. If you don’t put in when you’re free, there will be consequences.

Jungwoo: yes sir!

Kun: please stop calling me sir-

[Kun] [Jungwoo] have left the chat.

Taeil: how do Ten and Doyoung survive living with Kun

Chenle: it’s bc he basically doesn’t live with them

Chenle: he comes back to beat all of our asses so often

Taeil: ...strange. How is his life so put together??

Chenle: at the cost of his sleep

Chenle: his eyebags look like death

Chenle: he’s my idol for that!

Taeyong: Very concerning, please get some sleep Chenle??

Chenle: haha

[Chenle] has left the chat.

Taeyong: …??

Taeyong: sdfkjsdlfkjs SHIT

Taeil: Taeyong? cursing in front of the kids??

Taeyong: IM GOING TO BE LATE FOR MY CLASS SDLKFJAFLK

Taeil: that’s a first

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

Taeil: [link] make sure to look at this guys!! Especially renjun and mark. God knows your fingers can’t scroll up.

[Taeil] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one more pre-written chapter after this!


	8. fire extinguisher and closet

6:27 PM

[Kunhang] [YangYang] have entered the chat.

YangYang: yo owo

Kunhang: why do you always do THAT

YangYang: do what

Kunhang: the “owo” thing

YangYang: idk owo 

Kunhang: … 

YangYang: a-knee-ways wanna come by later and play smash ;))

Kunhang: okay first off

Kunhang: you spend way too much time on the internet

Kunhang: and secondly whyd you add a wink

YangYang: ;))) ja oder ja?? 

Kunhang: ...sure 

Kunhang: i need to finish my hw though

YangYang: okay 

YangYang: go and do ur nerdy shit 

Kunhang: you’re on thin ice yangyang

[Kunhang] has left the chat.

YangYang: @everyone entertain me

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: how abt no

YangYang: òwó?? excuse me???

Jaemin: thot begone

Jaemin: also did you finish the powerpoint yet?

YangYang: what powerpoint???

Jaemin: dude

Jaemin: how are you not failing the class???

YangYang: bc im smart uwu

Jaemin: the only thing smart about you is

YangYang: yes?

Jaemin: i’ve got nothing

YangYang: okay uncalled for

[Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Sicheng: kun wants u yangyang

YangYang: uh

Jaemin: again?

Sicheng: no i think its a good thing

Sicheng: he doesn’t have his hose out

Jaemin: ??? his WHAT

Sicheng: don’t worry about it

YangYang: oh phew

YangYang: i thought he found out about the closet and fire extinguisher thing

[Kun] has entered the chat.

Kun: What Fire Extinguisher And Closet Thing?

YangYang: 

Jaemin:

Sicheng:

Kun: 3

Kun: 2

[YangYang] has left the chat.

Kun: 1

Kun: : )

[Kun] has left the chat.

Jaemin: rip germany, he won’t be missed

Sicheng: literally the only times yangyang and chenle leave this chat is when kun is on their ass

Sicheng: honestly i think he lives at home more than they do

Jaemin: oh btw

Jaemin: can you tell renjun to unblock me

Sicheng: on what? And why does he have you blocked

Jaemin: uh

Jaemin: on every platform

Jaemin: he even has me blocked on linkedin if that’s possible

Jaemin: i may have insulted moomin?? 

Sicheng: 

Sicheng: idk man you’re own your own

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

Jaemin: he’s literally UR brother

Jaemin: men aint shit

[Jaemin] has left the chat.

9:26 AM

[Johnny] [Xiaojun] [Jungwoo] have entered the chat.

Jungwoo: OMFG

Xiaojun: I can’t believe he did that

Johnny: Can’t believe who did what?? 

Jungwoo: okay so

Jungwoo: you know how renjun blocked jaemin yesterday bc of moomin banter

Johnny: sounds like renjun 

Johnny: continue

Xiaojun: and Jaemin is desperate

Johnny: sounds like jaemin

Jungwoo: so jaemin came to school carrying one of those giant posters 

Jungwoo: with “RENJUN I’M SORRY PLEASE UNBLOCK ME” written on it

Xiaojun: and then he threw moomin merch at Renjun

Johnny: how’d he get that?? He’s poor

Xiaojun: i’m pretty sure it’s all from the asian supermarket near the outlet mall

Johnny: so not actual merch  
Xiaojun: yeah but he tried his best

[Jaehyun] has entered the chat.

Jaehyun: AND he embarrassed the fuck out of renjun lmao

Jaehyun: i could see xiaojun visibly cringing 

Jaehyun: along with hyuck 

Jungwoo: yangyang was clowning them the whole time but what’s new 

Johnny: wow

Johnny: #highschoolmemories

Xiaojun: why do you sound so OLD

Johnny: im BARELY LIKE

Johnny: whatever im JUST NOT OLD OKAY

Jaehyun: its okay you can stop lying i can get you a cane if you need one

Johnny: literally SHUT UP

Johnny: whatever i can’t deal with yall disrespectful asses anymore

Johnny: i understand taeyong now

Xiaojun: yeah, i’m going to go as well. The teacher finally came in

Jungwoo: imagine actually getting off your phone when the teacher comes

Xiaojun: JUNGWOO GET OFF YOUR PHONE

Jungwoo: YEESH FINE

[Johnny] [Xiaojun] [Jungwoo] have left the chat.

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: omg that was THE MOST HUMILIATING THING EVER

[Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Sicheng: it was kind of cute lol

Sicheng: jaemin’s ass is whippedt

Renjun: you’re only saying its cute bc ur starved of human contact

Sicheng: oh like you’re not

[Jisung] has entered the chat.

Jisung: why don’t you n jaemin just get together lmao

Jisung: im tired of seeing ur dumbasses flirting at lunch

Renjun: …eye

Renjun: AKLFDJLKFJ STOP IT

Jaehyun: heh he’s getting shyyyyy

Sicheng: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Renjun: i hate both of you SO MUCH

Renjun: i wouldn’t ever date jaem

Jaehyun: wow wounding

Jaehyun: im going to tell him you said that

Renjun: wait pls don’t

Sicheng: so you admit ur lying?

Renjun: you guys are both so annoying

Renjun: perfect match for each other

Jaehyun: hhahahahdskfsalfkhljsdf?? 

Sicheng: ...

Jisung: renjun you broke him

Jisung: did you end up unblocking jaemin??

Renjun: uh

Renjun: no oof going to go do it now

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Sicheng: i should leave too

Sicheng: if i get caught again my computer is getting taken away

Jaehyun: imagine having strict parents…

Sicheng: imagine being ranked lower than jeno in league… only jae can relate

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

Jisung: you’re lower than jeno???

Jaehyun: SHUT THE FUCK UP OK

Jisung: idk man that’s kind of sad

[Jisung] has left the chat.

Jaehyun: y’all going to be SORRY one of these days… just watch >:(

[Jaehyun] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that'll probably be the last update for this week!! i'm going to try and get ahead on some more chapters!!  
> and also, comments are greatly appreciated! even if they're just memes uwu


	9. kun takes 21 shots?? not clickbait (jk pls drink safely guys)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back...ish   
> warning!! pls don't drink like kun or else i will hunt you down and force feed you water

11:04 PM

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: guys, let’s start heading back.

Taeil: unlike some people i actually have to do shit tomorrow??

[Kun] [Ten] have entered the chat.

Kun: nOooOoO i don wann to

Kun: doNT MAEK MEgo bacKksdfj to helllllsf

Taeil: …

Taeil: how much did you let him drink?

Ten: uhm

Ten: enough? 

Taeil: NO SHIT

Ten: I COULDN’T STOP HIM,,, HE SAID HE WAS TAKING ONE SHOT FOR EVERY PERSON IN THIS GC THAT MADE HIM WANT TO YEET

Taeil: YOU LET HIM TAKE 21 SHOTS??

Ten: eye-

Ten: not exactly…?

Kun: hehHEHSDKFA

Kun: IF YOu wANtn toGEKT Me YOU;kk have TO FINd mE

[Kun] has left the chat.

Taeil: …,,,,

Taeil: if i don’t see all of you next to me in the next 15 minutes I WILL LEAVE WITHOUT YOU.

Ten: BITCH WHAT

Ten: THAT’S NOT FAIR A T ALL

Ten: what’s the POINT IN BEING OUR DRIVER IF YOU FINNA LEAVE WITHOUT US

Taeil: you snooze you lose. see you by the door at 11:20

[Taeil] has left the chat.

Ten: fuCKFUCKFUCK

Ten: @Yuta @Johnny @Taeyong @Doyoung IM NOT DRAGGING YALL HEADASSES BACK IF YOU DON’T COME WITH ME LIKE RN

Ten: oh god i have to go look for kun don’t i

[Ten] has left the chat.

Yuta: @Taeil bABABABBEEEE

Yuta: uwu whered my mans go

[Johnny] has entered the chat.

Johnny: lmao u called?

Yuta: bitch yuo wish hee hee

Johnny: michael jackson lookin axss

Yuta: fuqkl you

[Ten] has entered the chat.

Ten: I FOUND KUN

Johnny: kun was here?2/

Ten: if astral projecting counts as “here” yes

Yuta: ewww why do you snoud ssf sobeerr

Ten: seeing kun drunk has made me want to quit alcohol 

Ten: that shits scary

Johnny: so ee going or nah

Ten: SHIT I FORGOT WE HAVE TO GO LIKE NOW

Ten: i SWEAR yuta IF UR “MANS” DOESN’T GIVE US A RIDE HOME

Yuta: hehe fhcill he will

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: I won’t if you don’t get over here in approximately 30 seconds.

Ten: sdljfak KUNSTOP DO NOT STRIP OR ELSE I’M TELLING YOUR MOTHER

Taeil: lol how does it feel switching places with Kun??

Ten: REALLY BAD

[Ten] has left the chat.

Johnny: brOOo00 LET’s geTTIT

Yuta: fehslk AIGHT eEEEE

Taeil: are you guys pretending to be drunk just to mess with Ten?

Yuta: a little bit lol

Johnny: he deserves it

Taeil: 10 seconds now

Johnny: man WHy are YOU LIKE THIS

[Johnny] [Yuta] have left the chat.

Taeil: i feel like we’re missing something..

Taeil: hm

[Taeil] has left the chat.

8:23 AM

[Kunhang] [Xiaojun] have entered the chat.

Xiaojun: did they really just forget dotae like that??

Kunhang: if that’s what being an adult is like

Kunhang: i’m having regrets about being alive

Xiaojun: you didn’t have them before??

Xiaojun: anyways… i wonder what happened to dotae??

[Jaemin] [Yangyang][Mark] have entered the chat.

Jaemin: go to the other chat

Jaemin: Jisung and I have some

Jaemin: ideas ;)))

Kunhang: ...ideas??

Xiaojun: they better not being what i think they are

Kunhang: im lowkey curious though,,

Xiaojun: i suppose it can’t be that bad

[Kunhang] [Xiaojun] have left the chat.

Yangyang: no it really is that bad

Yangyang: honestly are you sure you guys don’t have a secret stan account or smth

Yangyang: cause i want in

Jaemin: check dms

[Jaemin] has left the chat.

Mark: you guys have another chat??

Yangyang: yeah for the nhs kids in this chat

Yangyang: xiaojun made it for “student council reasons” but then we took over

Mark: and why am i not in this chat??

Yangyang: lol he probably forgot you again

Mark: IT’S BEEN LIKE A WEEK SINCE THE CHIP ACCIDENT

Yangyang: ugh

Yangyang: fiIIiIne i’ll add you

Yangyang: since you’re clearly so lonely

Mark: biggest backhanded compliment i’ve been given in a month and trust me

Mark: there’s been a lot of competitors

Yangyang: i’m sure renjun can fix you up with something worse

Yangyang: and if everyone complains that you’re in the chat it’s not my fault

[Yangyang] has left the chat.

Mark: are yall even my friends or-

[Mark] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmmm i wonder,,, what has happened to dotae, the rule followers TM ???


	10. shit gets interesting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the nhs and smu chats begiN!!!  
> 10 chapters in and the dotae finally begins uwu

NHS CHATROOM

9:32 AM

[Mark] [Jeno] [Donghyuck] [Chenle] have entered the chat.

Jeno: Jaemin and Jisung do realize Xiaojun, our school council president, is in this chat right

Chenle: but xiaojun would never :(((

Chenle: oh hey mark! 

Donghyuck: ewwwww its mARK

Donghyuck: who invited you into the chat?? 

Mark: okay firstly donghyuck WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ME

Mark: secondly yangyang

Jeno: I knew Yangyang was the traitor smh >.>

Mark: aren’t you supposed to be on my side?

Donghyuck: why would jeno (uwu) be on your side *throw up emoji*

Chenle: did you just type out throw up emoji

Donghyuck: and what if i did

Jeno: do you need help to find the emoji keyboard…???

Mark: you don’t have the keyboard?? Dude its literally PRE INSTALLED

Donghyuck: SHUT UP I DON’T NEED TO HEAR THIS FROM YOU

Chenle: so is no one going to mention that doyoung and taeyong didn’t go back with taeil last night 

Chenle: like what’s the tea on that

[Jisung] has entered the chat.

Jisung: i love you chenle but don’t say that again

Jisung: and i thought jaemin and i made it pretty clear WHAT HAPPENED

Mark: wait i have to read it brb

Jeno: I don’t think that’s what happened…

Donghyuck: you really think taeyong is a top?? Y’all…

Jisung: ok well that was jaemin’s idea

Chenle: top…?

Jeno: … 

Jisung: on second thought maybe its for the best that you didn’t read it 

Chenle: ???

Donghyuck: chenle how do you not know what a top is

Donghyuck: YOU’RE IN HS

Mark: ok im done and i just gotta say what the fuck is going on in your and jaemin’s heads

Jeno: A lot

Donghyuck: probably 2 collective brain cells wheezing 

Chenle: i’m going to go googling bye

[Chenle] has left the chat.

Mark: omfg taeyong and kun are going to KILL US

Donghyuck: BETTER THAT HE FINDS OUT NOW

Jisung: rip guys lets pray

Jeno: i was not a part of this

[Jeno] has left the chat.

Mark: he’s really just going to let us die like that huh

Donghyuck: your fault

Mark: MY FAULT??? 

Jisung: i can’t believe you’ve destroyed chenle’s purity like that im disgusted

[Jisung] has left the chat.

Donghyuck: ugh the stank

[Donghyuck] has left the chat.

Mark: h-how…

Mark: and also how is chenle innocent if he’s your best friend jisung??

[Mark] has left the chat.

SMU CHATROOM

10:54 AM

[Yuta] [Taeil] have entered the chat.

Yuta: um…

Yuta: so does anyone know what happened to doyoung and taeyong

Yuta: honestly i feel like we’re shit friends 

Taeil: you think? 

Yuta: fuck,,,

Taeil: where’s ten though? Doesn’t he room with kun and doyoung?

Yuta: idk he hasn’t been picking up

Yuta: he’s probably just making sure kun won’t die 

[Ten] has entered the chat.

Taeil: What happened?

Ten: wouldn’t you like to know…

Taeil: ??? 

Yuta: Are you guys okay??? We’re really sorry about last night 

Yuta: total asshole move :(

Ten: yeah, kun and I are fine

Ten: well kun’s less fine but that’s because he’s having a horrible hangover

Yuta: then what about doyoung and taeyong?

Ten: normally i’d just spill but its not really my place so

[Ten] has left the chat.

[Johnny] has entered the chat.

Johnny: Taeyong’s back at the dorm

Yuta: and?? 

Johnny: i’m not really sure

Taeil: what do you mean?

Johnny: he just kind of greeted me and locked himself in our room

Taeil: did you check on him?

Johnny: i did but he’s being really weird

Yuta: okay i’m not pointing fingers but

Taeil: we’re all thinking the same thing

Johnny: … 

Johnny: i’m going to go try again

[Johnny] has left the chat.

Yuta: i’ll see ya later babe

Yuta: i’m going to go to their dorm

Taeil: ...shouldn’t you ask first?

Yuta: nah it’s fine

Yuta: we’re all family, right?

Taeil: right…

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Taeil: … 

Taeil: Gotta go and finish this shift… I guess…

[Taeil] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't forget to stream https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBr2O6_es2U !  
> sorry for the shorter chapter!!! i've just been slowed down a bit because i've been thinking how to go about this ;v;  
> ALSO!! i made a twt (finally)  
> https://twitter.com/cerealbowlerr  
> feel free to chat me up~


	11. jungwoo is a bloodhound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not posting for so long!! i was having trouble with this chapter despite its shortness :(( (hopefully) the chapters should be coming out at a quicker pace now :)

9:04 PM

[Lucas] [Jungwoo] have entered the chat.

Lucas: KLADSJFLKAFJSDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Lucas: @Jungwoo get ONLINE

Jungwoo: im BUSY

Lucas: no ur not i’m sitting next to you right now

Jungwoo: EWWW stop picKING YOUR NOSE

Jungwoo: IF YOU WIPE THAT FINGER ON ME IM GOING TO KILL YOU

Lucas: gET ON THEN

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: are you guys normally like this?

Jungwoo: NO

Lucas: YES!!

[Doyoung] has entered the chat.

Doyoung: @Taeyong I

Doyoung: EVERYTHING I SAID WAS TRUE 

Doyoung: SOIREALLYLIKEYOUANDI’DLIKEITIFYOUWOULDGOOUTWITHME

Doyoung: FUCK

Lucas: 

Jaemin:

Jungwoo: did that just happen?

[Ten] [Johnny] have entered the chat.

Ten: DID HE DO IT?!?

Johnny: ten YOU CANT JUST TELL PEOPLE TO DO THAT

Doyoung: TEN I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU LET ME DO THAT

Ten: don’t worry!!!

[Taeyong] has entered the chat.

Taeyong: …

Doyoung: FUCK TEN IM WORRYING

Johnny: 

Lucas: I CAN’T WATCH

[Lucas] has left the chat.

Jungwoo: damn

Jaemin: h 

Taeyong: Haha…

Taeyong: Sorry, I was pretty drunk that night so I don’t really know what happened… 

Doyoung: oh..

Taeyong: But I do remember what you said

Ten: is he going to continue?

Ten: it’s been 10 minutes

Johnny: idk he’s just sitting on the couch rn

Jaemin: is he okay?

Jungwoo: what does his face look like? Crying? Dying?

Johnny: he looks

Johnny: i don’t want to do this but as yangyang would say 

Johnny: “uwu” 

Ten: so he’s whip-

Taeyong: UMSFSKFJ

Taeyong: I LIKE YOU TOOSKDFAJ

Taeyong: i thought i made it too obviousSKDJALFKDJSF

[Doyoung] has left the chat.

Jaemin: no you really didn’t

Johnny: shit now he’s smashing his head into the pillows

Ten: doyoung just threw his phone

[Kun] has entered the chat.

Kun: Why is doyoung running out at 9 pm?

Kun: He’s not even wearing shoes

Ten: two words: (It’s because of Taeyong)

Kun: okay firstly that’s not two words do you know how counting works?

Jungwoo: damn go off

Kun: secondly FINALLY 

Johnny: ah young love

Jaemin: ew old people

Ten: at least they got their shit together

Ten: kind of

Johnny: yeah what can ur cousin say

Jaemin: JAEHYUN IS TRYING

[Jaemin] has left the chat.

Johnny: i’m going to go 

Johnny: i don’t want to see dotae’s couple shit

[Johnny] has left the chat.

Jungwoo: NO WE NEED YOU TO GET THE INSIDE SHIT

Kun: Jungwoo do you ever stop seeking drama or…?

Ten: he’s next level

Ten: like a bloodhound 

Jungwoo: >:(

Jungwoo: and what if i am

Jungwoo: OW LUCAS STOP PINCHING MEKASJFLKDSF

[Jungwoo] has left the chat.

Kun: Well, I’m glad that they’re finally getting their shit together. It’s a start.

Ten: cursing? From kun??

Kun: shut up.

[Kun] has left the chat.

Ten: well aight then 

Ten: wonder how tomorrow is going to go when all the realizations set in

[Ten] has left the chat.

[Chenle] has entered the chat.

Chenle: oh my god jaemin why’d you call taeyong a top

[Chenle] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uwu dotae  
> don't worry there's going to be more panicked taeyong   
> a lot more


	12. school council prez tingz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just wanna say sorry for the hiatus!! i've been kind of busy and been slacking behind since i wasn't too sure where i wanted to go with this
> 
> but here's a longer chapter to make up for it!!

8:17 AM

[Xiaojun] has entered the chat.

Xiaojun: it’s really great that doyoung and taeyong finally got together and all

Xiaojun: well at least i think they did 

Xiaojun: but are we going to actually go to the festival or do anything?

[Taeil] has entered the chat.

Taeil: oh yeah!! lol forgot about that

Xiaojun: aren’t you the one who brought it up?

[Jisung] has entered the chat.

Jisung: looks like SOMEONE is getting old

Taeil: Looks like SOMEONE is getting their ass whooped for being a disrespectful child

Xiaojun: how are you even up jisung? don’t you wake up at like 2 PM everyday?

Jisung: well YEAH but at like 7 AM my damn neighbors decided they wanted to fucking construct a damn observatory or some shit on their roof 

Taeil: Wait isn’t your neighbor jaemin? 

Taeil: Actually aren’t we all kind of neighbors? 

[Sicheng] has entered the chat.

Sicheng: isn’t the whole universe kind of neighbors

Jisung: h

Xiaojun: technically no because

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: SHUT UP

Jaemin: IT’S CALLED RENOVATION

Jisung: THAT IS N O T RENOVATION

Jisung: WHAT YOU GUYS DID SHOULD BE ILLEGAL and you KNOW IT JAEMIN

Sicheng: things are heating up in the house design fandom

Xiaojun: you mean architecture?

Sicheng: i said what i said 

Jaemin: [img] does THIS look like an observatory to you?

Taeil: yeah kind of

Xiaojun: is that not one?

Sicheng: i’m calling the police on that

Jisung: SEE

[Jaehyun] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: JAEHYUN TELL THEM IT LOOKS NORMAL

Sicheng: jaehyunnie it looks bad right?

Jaehyun:

Xiaojun: oh boy

Jisung: jaehyun it’s been 5 minutes r u okay ??

Taeil: take your time

Jaehyun: uhm

Jaehyun: it looks uh

Jaehyun: uh

Sicheng: bad, right?

Jaemin: great, right? you wouldn’t want to disappoint auntie would you?

Jaemin: I’m telling her you said her design sucked

Jaemin: this is a threat uwu

Jaehyun: I DIDNT EVEN SAY ANYTHING

Xiaojun: and this is how a man falls 

Jaehyun: how am i supposed to pick between my aunt and my bf

Jaemin: BF???

Jisung: BOYFRIEND???

Jisung: JAEMIN GET THE AO3 ACCOUNT READY

Taeil: wait what this is happening too quick

Xiaojun: dotae was literally yesterday 

Jaehyun: BEST FRIEND 

Sicheng: played y’all 

Jisung: damn.

Xiaojun: …

Jaemin: the only people you’re playing is you and jaehyun

Jaehyun: haHAHAHA

Taeil: kids make my head hurt

Taeil: actually NO all of you make my head hurt

Sicheng: i thought i was your favorite?? :(

Taeil: hhhhh 

[Taeil] has left the chat.

Jisung: Biggest rejection of all time

Xiaojun: wait so are we or are we not doing the halloween festival??

Jaemin: why don’t you figure that out 

Jaemin: school council prez

Jaehyun: It would only sound cool if xiaojun was the class president

Sicheng: yeah school council prez just doesn’t roll off the tongue

Jaemin: reverse card uno

Jisung: that’s not how you use that meme

Jaemin: YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE

Jisung: lol nah why would i do that?

Xiaojun: fine whatever i’ll just do everything by myself

Xiaojun: like i ALWAYS do

[Xiaojun] has left the chat.

Jisung: should i go help him

Sicheng: yeah probably

Jisung: thank me later

[Jisung] has left the chat.

Jaehyun: xiaojun’s like mark 

Jaehyun: but more put together and he’s the school council prez

Sicheng: why does everything always come back to mark?

[Yuta] has entered the chat.

Yuta: did i hear work out?

Jaehyun: how-

Sicheng: NO GO AWAY

Sicheng: IF I HEAR THOSE TWO WORDS AGAIN IM GOING TO THROW YOU OUT OF A WINDOW

Yuta: just kidding

Yuta: damn sicheng :(

Yuta: i just came back to say that we ARE going to the halloween festival

Jaehyun: when?

Yuta: forgot that part

Yuta: it’s on the google docs

Yuta: yeah ik im so cool i check kun’s docs ;)

Sicheng: ew

Jaehyun: he has a doc?

[Kunhang] has entered the chat.

Kunhang: the festival is on halloween 

Kunhang: not sure how you missed that part but its okay

Yuta: i was close

Sicheng: no you REALLy weren’t

Jaehyun: what time?

Kunhang: Besides the fact that’s ALSO on the document

Kunhang: it’s from like 4-9? But kun says we don’t have to stay the   
whole time

Jaehyun: alright, thanks

Sicheng: but what about trick or treating

Yuta: aren’t you a senior?

Sicheng: and? SHUT UP 

Kunhang: are you really older than me?

Jaehyun: this is real bully sicheng hours lmaoo

Sicheng: aren’t you supposed to be my BF??

Jaehyun: yeah but who says i can’t watch shit go down

Kunhang: wait

Yuta: BF???

Sicheng: best friend

Jaehyun: : )

Yuta: damn jae...i’m sorry 

Sicheng: what’s wrong with being my best friend… aight….

Kunhang: ***-zoned

Kunhang: F

Kunhang: anyways i’m going to go tell xj and jisung they don’t have to lose anymore braincells

Yuta: have more faith in our youth!

Kunhang: i AM YOUR YOUTH

[Kunhang] has left the chat.

Sicheng: why are you still here?

Jaehyun: yeah don’t you have classes?

Yuta: >:( 

Yuta: For your information, I DO have classes but i decided to spare some of my precious free time to talk to my favorite children again

Yuta: i’m regretting

[Yuta] has left the chat.

Sicheng: …

Sicheng: i’ll never tell him but that was kind of uwu

Jaehyun: yeah except for the fact we’re not children

Sicheng: still

Jaehyun: so

Jaehyun: are we going to the festival or going trick or treating?

Sicheng: well i probably have to take renjun

Sicheng: even though there’s like a kajillion other people there to watch over his annoying ass

Sicheng: but you can still go trick or treating if you want :)

Jaehyun: it’s fine i’ll go with you

Jaehyun: we are getting kind of old….

Sicheng: remember when that one house just slammed the door shut when they saw us

Jaehyun: good times

Jaehyun: i gtg now

Jaehyun: see you at school tmwr 

Jaehyun: <3

[Jaehyun] has left the chat.

Sicheng: …

[Sicheng] has left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'll try and upload more often?? maybe 1/2 times a week? (hopefully) so please look out for more crack!


	13. clown noises *squeak squeak* (pt 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so basically i posted this earlier but it was broken so um- hopefully it should work in two parts?  
> i was going to upload this yesterday however i was really busy and i forgot to

2:36 PM

[Doyoung] has entered the chat.

Doyoung: You guys could never…

[Johnny] has entered the chat.

Johnny: what

Doyoung: imagine being able to go on a ((perfect)) date with Taeyong 

Doyoung: Only I can relate

Johnny: doesn’t that insinuate that taeyong’s never been on a date before

Doyoung: Stop being a smartass

Johnny: lmao isn’t that your job?

[Jungwoo] has entered the chat.

Jungwoo: soooo you guys ARE dating??

[Ten] has entered the chat.

Ten: yeah froyo don’t get too ahead of urself 

Johnny: FROYO

Jungwoo: you should’ve stretched before u reached that hard

Ten: I don’t need critique from an actual child 

Doyoung: Okay I guess no one wants to hear what I have to say,

Doyoung: huh.

Ten: oh noooo

Johnny: what a shameeee

Jungwoo: NO I DO PLEASE

Johnny: froyo you act like i don’t LIVE with taeyong 

Ten: yeah doyoung could never

Doyoung: SHUT UP

Doyoung: JUST you wait

[Taeyong] has entered the chat.

Taeyong: Wait for what?

Doyoung: Uh

Jungwoo: are you guys dating???

Ten: so basically froyo here thinks he’s going to live with you and become ur (willing) manslave as a result

Taeyong: Sorry, what?

Doyoung: LITERALLY SAID NOTHING OF THE SORTS

Ten: YOU WERE THINKING IT 

Doyoung: TEN OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR

Ten: NO GO THE FUCK AWAY

Doyoung: I HAVE KUN ON SPEED DIAL

Ten: THAT MAN HAS NO POWER OVER ME

[Ten] has left the chat.

Doyoung: @Kun @Kun @Kun

[Doyoung] has left the chat.

Johnny: .

Johnny: why is it that whenever this chat tries to have a normal conversation it always ends up with doyoung and ten fighting

Jungwoo: AND NO ONE HAS ANSWERED MY QUESTION

Jungwoo: LITERALLY ALL OF YOU KNOW BUT NONE OF YOU ARE SPEAKING

Taeyong: …

Taeyong: No, we’re not.

Johnny: wait what

Jungwoo: ????

Taeyong: Well, not yet. :) 

Jungwoo: awwww

Taeyong: I’m seeing him again Wednesday though...aAAAAAAAA////

Jungwoo: hhh that’s like 2 days away :’(

Johnny: TAEYONG WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME LIKE THIS

Taeyong: Huh?? How did I lie??

Johnny: I DON’T KNOW 

Johnny: YOUR AURA?? IT FELT ROMANTIC?

Jungwoo: what are you? a mystic or something??

[Yangyang] has entered the chat.

Yangyang: INSTINCT >>> MYSTIC

Jungwoo: ,

Johnny: you still play Pokémon go?

Yangyang: yeah? You got a problem with that?

Jungwoo: *whispers* Yangyang is going through that….phase

Yangyang: at least i don’t TYPE OUT *WHISPERS* D:<

Taeyong: Anyways, I’m going to go and get ahead on my work. 

Taeyong: And you all should too. Especially Johnny. Don’t think I don’t see you watching Friends on your laptop.

[Taeyong] has left the chat.

Johnny: wait

Johnny: how does he know about that

Johnny: TAEYONG WAIT

[Johnny] has left the chat.

Jungwoo: well, 

Yangyang: What are you looking at owo? FIGHT??

[Jungwoo] has left the chat.

[Jaemin] has entered the chat.

Jaemin: you really got ditched like that LMAOO

Yangyang: I WILL FIGHT YOU

Yangyang: TOMORROW DURING LUNCH

Jaemin: WE DON’T EVEN HAVE THE SAME LUNCH SHIFT

Yangyang: WELL THEN SNEAK OUT DURING CLASS

Jaemin: BET

Yangyang: OKAY BET

[Xiaojun] has entered the chat.

Xiaojun: 

Yangyang: 

Jaemin:

Yangyang: oh HEYyyyyy IT’S MY SWEET AND WONDERFUL BEST FRIEND I LOVE  
yOuUu

Jaemin: IT’S OUR FAVORITE PREZZZ HAHa

Xiaojun: …

Xiaojun: i love you guys too but that doesn’t make it so i can exempt you from consequences

Yangyang: OH OF COURSE!! RIGHT JAEM???

Jaemin: yes!! we would NEVER think to do something like that uwu

Xiaojun: alright…well, just remember that sophomores have their PSATs  
coming up soon :) good luck!

[Xiaojun] has left the chat.

Yangyang: …

Jaemin: uh oh

[Yangyang] [Jaemin] have left the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know how often i'll be able to upload after this since school is starting but hopefully the next chapter will be out soon!


	14. clown noises *squeak squeak* (pt 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pt 2 of the chapter :)

NHS CHATROOM

3:03 PM

[Yangyang] [Jaemin] have entered the chat.

Jisung: so that concludes my essay on why all spiders should be banned

Jeno: but spiders are necessary to the world’s ecosystem??

Chenle: Actually That’s What Scientists WANT you to think

Donghyuck: sorry jeno, but i got agree with them on this one ;((

Jeno: < / 3 

Yangyang: HAVE ANY OF YOU STARTED PRACTICING FOR THE PSATS

Chenle: sorry A What?

Jaemin: prez just dropped the bomb on us 

Donghyuck: why is that a bomb we did it last year too

Jeno: I’ve been studying uwu

Donghyuck: yeah he’s been studying with ME

Jeno: hehe 

Jisung: and i thought i was a bad student… yangyang and jaemin are clownsss

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: i heard clowning yangyang and jaemin? 

Jaemin: HEY

Yangyang: STOPPPP WE’RE ALREADY BEING BULLIED BY SCHOOL

Renjun: all i hear is squeaky shoe noises

Chenle: im screWED sdfkaf TT0TT

Jeno: how do you even study jisung?? don’t you spend all your time  
gaming with chenle?? ;;

Jisung: i’m just that good 

Donghyuck: sure sure…

Jisung: and don’t worry chenle, you can depend on me. i’ll help you study heh

Chenle: rly?? ty!!!!! iLY

Jisung: i’ll send you my notes now 

Chenle: okay!!!

[Chenle] [Jisung] have left the chat.

Jaemin: he thinks he’s slick huh

Donghyuck: cough coug-

Donghyuck: okay well i have to go

Donghyuck: see you NERDS later (minus jeno <3)

Jeno: byeee ^^

[Donghyuck] has left the chat. 

Jaemin: i hate blatant favoritism

Renjun: i hate couples

Jeno: ???

Yangyang: AND I HATE SCHOOL HHHHH WHY CAN’T LIFE GO BACK TO THE ANCIENT TIMES

Jeno: you’d probably be dead before you got to highschool…

Yangyang: EXACTLY

[Kunhang] has entered the chat.

Kunhang: yangyang you still up to hanging out later?

Yangyang: CAN’T I HAVE TO (STRESS ABOUT) STUDYINGGGG

[Yangyang] has left the chat.

Kunhang: LOL

Kunhang: I forgot sophomores still have to take PSATs losers 

Renjun: at least we don’t actually have to take the SATs smh

Jeno: we will soon! but i’m sure it’ll be fine ^w^! how hard can it be with proper studying?

Jaemin: so in conclusion jeno is an actual demon

Kunhang: Jeno’s going to die in junior year

Renjun: to be fair, xiaojun is also a junior

Kunhang: xiaojun’s a… special case 

Jaemin: wow racism? just cause he’s asian?

Kunhang: ????? COME AGAIN?

Jeno: kunhang ;;; don’t be mean to xiaojun

Kunhang: jeno looks like an angel on the outside but all he does is side with actual d*vils…

Renjun: jaemin isn’t funny

Jaemin: babe don’t say that ;P

Renjun: i am NOT YOUR BABE SSKLFJA

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Jaemin: …

Jeno: :(

Kunhang: wow

Jaemin: :’((((

Kunhang: it’s okay he wishes he was ur babe don’t be sad

[Renjun] has entered the chat.

Renjun: NO I DON’T

[Renjun] has left the chat.

Kunhang: he really just came back on to say that

Jeno: RIP jaem

Jaemin: School Tomorrow’s Going To Be Fun :)

Kunhang: REMEMBER XIAOJUN IS IN THIS CHAT

Jeno: i’m sure he just means he’s excited to learn!!! right?

[Jaemin] has left the chat.

Jeno: omo;

Kunhang: can we get an F for renjun and jaemin’s brain cells tomorrow?

Jeno: F *^*

[Kunhang] [Jeno] have left the chat.


End file.
